Human bonds are no different especially the ones we build ourselves rather than those we were born to. I have witnessed many blood relatives quenching their thirst in the blood of each other (quite almost). And the next moment of crisis, they stick to each other like the good old Fevicol. Maybe that is the beauty of biology.
Wonder, why can’t the same be in relationships which we choose? One unpleasantness and parting ways becomes the only option. Even worse, the parting is not always pleasant be it among friends or lovers. The good memories die sudden death and all that is left is bitterness, more bitterness. Soon before you realize your friends become your chosen foes. Both of you ensure that life gets no less easy. You bad mouth, gossip, stalk, hack or do anything to make life more miserable.
Relationships are worse. You separate your beds, belongings, pets, homes, kids and even parents cum in-laws. You derive pleasure in hurting where it hurts most. You attack everything you can get hold of. Women go to the extent of sucking out cash from their partner’s account without his knowledge. By the time he gets to know, he is bankrupt. Men stalk their women which includes hiring a Detective Agency to follow the tracks, hack their social and professional accounts, overall feed their fears and make the most out of it. Result is that she gives up because sanity is the most precious commodity of life.
What is it that we have no respect for the ex? Once upon a time, the same person was the most special. Does the basic feeling of respect lose in front of vengeance? The love that bonded seems to die of a catastrophic heart failure. All that is left is emotional ruins that take time to re-build. Admitted, that partings aren’t pleasant even in the animal kingdom. They fight each other and sometimes lose their battles in hatred. Still they respect each other and acknowledge the loss. They don’t continue to keep wounding the wounds, like we the greater species do. Once defeated, they leave the loser to its own fate. But here, even the society doesn’t miss a chance to inflict pains. We as social animals love the failures of others. We probe till the person cracks. We entertain each other at somebody else’s expense. And if that isn’t enough, we even try to take advantage of the hapless situation. Happily married men get a high in harassing the recently single woman, knowing her defense is weakest. Snide remarks on her status become the most regular feature. And if she complains all she hears, “Come on, that was just a joke you’re over-reacting, you should move faster and get open.” So what if she finds that suddenly all men start hitting on her and age holds no bar, by the way. Society just assumes that she is single so she is ready to mingle. Nobody bothers for her opinion though. Her business becomes yours.
As for the man, he becomes another case study of failures even though he might be meeting his targets. We wait for one slip and we fire him. Telling him, “You need a break to sort out things.” It doesn’t matter that he must be the most sorted out guy but we tell ourselves, “If he can’t manage his wife how can he manage clients?”
PS: I know the post isn’t as happy as I aim for. But the need to pen down my pent up emotions were too strong this time.
Pic Courtesy: Google Images
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